Childhood anxiety is more common than you might think. It can still feel lonely and overwhelming when it's your child who can't fall asleep or won't get out of the car.
If you're a parent in San Jose worried about your child’s constant fears, frequent meltdowns, or worries that never seem to settle, a lot of families are right there with you.
Anxiety shows up in a lot of ways:
- trouble sleeping
- avoiding certain places or people
- clinginess
- irritability.
Parenting an anxious child is hard, and it's easy to feel unsure of what actually helps. A child therapist who understands how anxiety shows up at different ages can help your child build confidence and coping skills, and help you know what to do at home.
I’m Hannah Ly, an anxiety therapist in San Jose who works with children. I use play therapy with the child and parent coaching with you. Here's what you can expect when your child starts seeing a child anxiety therapist like me.
What to Expect When Visiting an Anxiety Therapist for Kids
If you're thinking about bringing your child to an anxiety therapist, know that the start is slow on purpose. The first goal is for your child to feel comfortable in the room.
The First Session with an Anxiety Therapist
In the first session, the main goal is for your child to start trusting the therapist. It's a “get-to-know-you” session, and nobody is pressuring your child to talk about the worries yet.
There are crayons, small toys, puppets, and simple games, and your child can pick what they want and go at their own pace. What they choose and how they play tells the therapist a lot about your child’s personality, interests, and comfort level, and the rest of therapy builds on that.
For you, it's a chance to talk openly about what your child is struggling with, what worries you, and what you're hoping therapy will change.
The therapist will ask how your child acts and feels at home, at school, and with friends. Together you'll decide what to focus on first and make a plan that fits your child. That back-and-forth between you and the therapist matters a lot, and it doesn't stop after the first session.
Ongoing Sessions with Anxiety Therapy
Ongoing sessions help your child understand their anxiety and find ways to handle it. They change from week to week depending on what your child is needing.
Some days it's play therapy: drawing, art projects, or games that help your child show what they're feeling. Other days it's more practice: acting out a scary situation, telling a story about it, or trying deep breathing and picturing a calm place.
As therapy goes on, the focus gets more specific: figuring out what sets off the anxiety, finding coping skills that actually work for your child, and getting through hard situations a little more steadily.
For example, the therapist might help your child make a short list of calming strategies to use when they feel overwhelmed. Sessions may also build your child’s confidence with kind self-talk and by approaching fears slowly, one small step at a time.
No two kids get the same therapy, because no two kids are anxious about the same things in the same way. Play therapy and practical coping skills work together, and over time your child gets more practice handling hard moments with a little more confidence.
Progress isn't a straight line. Some weeks look like nothing is changing, and then something shifts.
Play Therapy: Healing Anxiety Through Fun
Play therapy is at the heart of how I work, because for children, play isn’t just something to do. It’s how they communicate, work through feelings, and make sense of their world.
In play therapy, a child might use pretend play to work through a scary situation, build a block tower that stands for how much worry they can handle, or use puppets to say things they can't say out loud yet. For a kid, that feels a lot more doable than sitting and talking about their worries.
It looks like play, and it is play, and it's also how children learn about themselves and practice calming down. In play therapy your child can show their inner world and look at the anxiety from a little distance, without it feeling overwhelming or clinical.
My Approach to Anxiety Therapy
As an anxiety therapist in San Jose, I don't only work with the child. Children don't grow up in a vacuum, so I work with the family around them too.
Sessions with me are playful and low-pressure, even for kids who walk in hesitant. I use games, art, and movement so therapy feels like something to look forward to instead of something scary.
At the same time, I give parents practical strategies and explain what I'm seeing, so you know what to do outside of our sessions. It's a partnership: you know your child best, and I know anxiety.
Helping Parents Through Anxiety Therapy with Parent Coaching
Parenting an anxious child can be overwhelming, and it makes sense to feel that way. That’s why parent coaching is a central part of how I work.
Every four weeks we meet without your child and work out what to try at home:
- a more predictable routine
- calming practices like deep breathing you can do together
- ways to stay steady during a meltdown instead of getting pulled into it.
Parent sessions are also a place for your own worries and frustrations. You matter in this too, and the best parents ask for help. When you feel calmer and more sure of what to do, your child can borrow some of that calm.
It won't make every hard evening go away, but it will give you a plan for the next one.
Why Choose an Anxiety Therapist Specializing in Kids?
A therapist who only works with children knows how kids think and feel at different ages. Children experience the world differently than adults do. They think, feel, and communicate through imagination and play, and therapy has to work with that instead of against it.
Not every therapist is trained to work with children, and anxiety is where that shows. Anxiety in a six-year-old looks different from anxiety in an adult, and different again in a teenager.
A stomachache before school, a meltdown at bedtime, a kid who won't go to a birthday party: those can all be anxiety.
A therapist who mostly sees adults might miss it, or offer coping tools that don't make sense to a child. That’s why it helps to work with someone who does child-centered therapy every day.
I use child-centered approaches: play therapy, art and other creative expression, coping strategies that fit your child, and regular parent sessions. All of it starts from where your child is right now.
My goal is to help your child:
- Develop emotional awareness by identifying and naming anxious feelings
- Learn practical tools to manage worries and regain a sense of control
- Build self-esteem and confidence in daily life
- Strengthen relationships within the family and beyond
Above all, I want your child, and your family, to have more room for joy and connection again. That takes time, and some weeks will be harder than others, but feeling safe and understood is where it starts.
Help for Your Child's Anxiety: Schedule an Appointment with a Child Anxiety Therapist Today
Watching your child struggle with anxiety can make any parent feel helpless. It doesn’t have to stay this way. With a child therapist who knows anxiety, your child can learn ways to handle the worry, and your family can get some breathing room back.
If you want to talk about whether therapy makes sense for your child, book a free 15-minute call with me, Hannah Ly. We'll talk about what you're seeing and whether play therapy is the right fit.
About the Author: Hannah Ly, Anxiety Therapist in San Jose
Hannah Ly is an anxiety therapist in San Jose who works with children, teens, and their parents. She is trained in play therapy, trauma therapy, and brainspotting therapy, which give children ways to work through feelings without having to explain them in words. Her approach starts with connection, and with the belief that a struggling child is communicating something, not broken.
Hannah works closely with parents through parent coaching every four weeks, so what happens in therapy carries over to home. She also helps teens manage anxiety, with practical ways to lower stress and build confidence. If your child is dealing with trauma, anxiety, or big feelings, or you need parenting support, Hannah would be glad to talk.
If you're looking for a play therapist, child therapist, or teen therapist in San Jose, contact her to set up a free 15-minute call.
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