Questions to Ask an Anxiety Therapist for Kids in San Jose

Watching your child struggle with anxiety is heartbreaking, and it’s exhausting. You’ve tried the worry charts, the breathing exercises, the reassurance at bedtime, and the fears are still there, too big for your child to carry.

It’s hard not to feel the weight of that, especially when you’re doing everything you can and still aren’t sure it’s enough.

Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re failing.

It means this is hard, and you could use some support.

I’m Hannah Ly, an anxiety therapist for kids in San Jose, and I help families with exactly this. If your child is struggling and you’re thinking about therapy, that’s an important step for your child.

Finding the right therapist matters, and asking good questions helps you get there. In this blog, I will walk you through the questions to ask an anxiety therapist, so you can get a feel for their training, their approach, and how they would work with your family.

Why Do Questions Matter in Anxiety Therapy?

Anxiety shows up differently in every child. One child gets stomachaches before school, another can’t fall asleep, another melts down over small changes. So you want a therapist who can meet your child where they are.

Therapists often adjust their approach (for example, using play therapy with younger kids) to fit the child. Asking questions on the first call gives you a real sense of the therapist’s methods and how they plan to support your child and your family through therapy.

Knowing those answers builds trust, and it helps you feel confident in your choice. You have a big part in your child’s growth, and the more you understand, the more you can support your child through the anxiety.

The right therapist understands what your child is needing and fits your family’s goals and values. Here are the questions I would ask an anxiety therapist on that first call.

Questions to Ask an Anxiety Therapist for Children

1. What experience do you have in treating children's anxiety?

Not all therapists specialize in children. Anxiety in kids often looks different than it does in adults, and working with kids takes specific skills and experience. Look for someone with a strong background in childhood anxiety who understands what is typical at each age.

Why this is important: A therapist who knows the triggers that are common for kids (school stress, social fears, separation anxiety) will have strategies that actually fit your child.

2. What specific therapy techniques do you use for children with anxiety?

Therapists use different approaches depending on their training. Some focus on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), while others use methods like play therapy, brainspotting, or parent coaching. Ask which techniques they use and how those techniques help with anxiety.

Why this is important: Therapy built for children, like play therapy, lets kids express their feelings in ways that are comfortable for them. In play therapy, children use toys, art, and stories to work through their feelings and practice new ways of coping.

3. How do you involve parents in the therapy process for anxiety?

You want to know how involved you will be. Many therapists build in parent participation through parent coaching, while others work mostly with the child.

Why this is important: You are one of the most important influences in your child's life, and you spend way more time with your child than any therapist does. A therapist who includes parent coaching helps what your child learns in therapy carry over into home.

4. What is the expected duration of anxiety therapy for my child’s anxiety?

Every child is different, but it helps to hear a rough timeline based on the therapist’s experience with kids like yours.

Why this is important: This question sets expectations early and gives you a general sense of how long it may take to see meaningful progress for your child.

5. How can I support my child outside of therapy sessions?

Therapy doesn’t stop when the session ends. Ask what you can do at home: what to say when the worry spikes, how to respond at bedtime, what to try before school. Parent coaching is where a lot of that happens.

Why this is important: What happens at home, with support from parent coaching, matters just as much as what happens in the therapy room.

6. What are the signs I should look for to know if anxiety therapy is working?

Progress can be subtle, and it takes time, so it isn’t always easy to see right away. Ask the anxiety therapist what progress might look like over time and how they track it.

They may set goals with you, check in regularly, and ask for your feedback on how your child is feeling, how they cope, and how their relationships are going.

Why this is important: Noticing the small wins helps you stay with it when progress feels slow. It also shows where the approach or the goals might need to change, so therapy keeps fitting what your child is needing.

Additional Topics to Discuss in Anxiety Therapy

7. What are your views on medication for children with anxiety, and are you able to prescribe?

Most therapists don’t prescribe medication, but they often work alongside doctors who do, like psychiatrists or pediatricians. Ask how they think about medication and whether they might recommend it as part of a bigger plan.

Why this is important: You will understand your options, and you will hear whether the therapist keeps an open mind while trying approaches without medication first, when that makes sense.

8. What is your approach to play therapy, and how does it help children with anxiety express themselves?

Play therapy is a common choice for children, especially younger ones who don’t have the words for their worries yet. Hearing how a therapist uses play therapy tells you a lot about how they connect with kids on their level.

Why this is important: Play therapy provides kids with a safe and fun way to express complex emotions and learn effective coping skills.

See an Anxiety Therapist in San Jose: Schedule an Appointment

Finding the right child therapist or teen therapist in San Jose can feel overwhelming. You aren’t looking for just any therapist. You’re looking for the right fit for your child. As an experienced play therapist, I welcome your questions, all of them. We both want the same thing: for your child to feel steadier and more like themselves.

If you’re looking for a child or teen therapist in San Jose who specializes in anxiety, I would be happy to talk. My name is Hannah Ly, and I use play therapy to help children work through anxiety and build confidence. A free 15-minute call is a good place to start.

About Hannah Ly: Anxiety Therapist in San Jose for Kids

Hannah Ly is an anxiety therapist based in San Jose who works with children, teens, and their families. With a focus on play therapy, Hannah gives kids a place to express themselves and build the skills to handle anxiety. She shapes therapy around what each child is needing, so they feel understood along the way.

As a child therapist in San Jose, Hannah also works closely with parents, through parent coaching that helps the whole family support their child’s progress. If you’re looking for a play therapist for your child, a teen therapist for your adolescent, or parent coaching to understand and connect with your child, Hannah would be glad to talk.

When you’re ready, schedule a free consultation call. Hannah can talk with you about what is going on and what your family is needing right now.